Wedding attire

[lethargic_man]

Poll #10405 Wedding attire

Open to: Registered Users, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 5

View Respondents

It's liv's wedding in a week and a half. liv's instructions say "For the ceremony, there is no strict dress code. [...] We hope that [you] will help us to mark the occasion by wearing elegant clothes, but you are welcome to set your own style." How should I turn up?

View Answers

In a DJ
1 (20.0%)

In a lounge suit
0 (0.0%)

In a waistcoat and bow tie
3 (60.0%)

In a ballgown
1 (20.0%)

Other (suggestions in comments)
0 (0.0%)

I reserve the right not to be bound by your responses. :o)

Comments

[lavendersparkle]

Only wear a DJ if the ceremony is after 6pm. If before 6pm, morning dress.

[lethargic_man]

Pretty much every (Jewish) wedding I have ever been to has started with the chuppah at around 3 (and then gone on until about one in the morning), yet has been black tie. Morning dress I associate with the groom or the groom's party (or at any rate, that was the way it was in my parents' wedding photos).

So sue us, the whole community. ;^b

[jack]

Hm. I agree that's traditional, but I think the tradition is fading. I like morning suits in theory, but if most people, including the groom and wedding party, don't want to wear morning suits to the wedding, I'm not sure it's a good idea for a guest to automatically do so :)

[jack]

FWIW, any of the options are acceptable, we probably expect some people in each of them :)

[hairyears]

I will be wearing chinos, a blazer and - possibly - a cravat.

[liv]

I voted for ballgown because I totally love the idea of you wearing a ballgown to the wedding. But realistically I don't think you'd feel comfortable in a full-on gown, and it's likely you'd have difficulty sourcing anything between now and the wedding. So my sensible vote is for the waistcoat and bowtie; that's the style that is most you. A lounge suit would be ok, but a bit boring, and a DJ is a good default option for men who don't really want to think about clothes. Technically lavendersparkle is right that you shouldn't wear black tie during the day, but we're not going to be super-formal about that.

[curious_reader]

Oh, it was you. I thought ballgown means dress. I understood it as a joke like me suggesting wearing my skirts or dresses to him.

[lethargic_man]

Oh, it was you.

If you go to View Poll Results, you can click on view answers to see who's answered what.

I thought ballgown means dress. I understood it as a joke like me suggesting wearing my skirts or dresses to him.

It does, and is respectively.

[lethargic_man]

I wasn't seriously going to wear a ballgown anyway, because, aside from such issues as price and bosom simulation, whilst your circle of friends might not bat an eyelid at a man turning up in a ballgown, the same would not be true of all the people present, and I don't want to completely trash my reputation with people like your mother and grandmother.

[liv]

Um, it's my wedding, all the people present are going to be part of my circle of friends, obviously! I'm not going to invite a bunch of random strangers, am I? And I don't know what you're imputing about my mother and grandmother, they have seen men wearing dresses before (eg my brother, for many years up to his accident) and are not at all the sort of people to think of someone as trash just because they dress unconventionally.

Nice ballgowns are expensive, that part I will concede; I'm really pleased that I let myself be talked into spending a lot of money on mine, but it's quite possible you wouldn't feel the same. OTOH you can do quite well on ebay, if you're willing to poke around a bit. Don't know what the range is like for someone of your figure, but I bet there's something.

[lethargic_man]

Um, it's my wedding, "all the people present" are going to be part of my "circle of friends", obviously!

I'd have assumed all the people present would include your friends, your (extended) family, jack's friends and jack's family, and I'd have thought you could really only have vouched for the first of those. After all, there are plenty of members of my family with widely divergent views from my own: just because they're related to me doesn't have to mean we have anything in common.

I don't know what you're imputing about my mother and grandmother, they have seen men wearing dresses before (eg my brother, for many years up to his accident) and are not at all the sort of people to think of someone as trash just because they dress unconventionally.

Well, I wasn't to know that. From what I know of your mother, I'd have put her down as a little conservative.

[curious_reader]

I would think if I did not know you you were a transgender person. I would be very surprised seeing you in a dress for a serious event such as a wedding. It is not Purim.

[lethargic_man]

Point the first: Transvestite neither means, nor implies, transgender.

Point the second: Why's everyone taking this so seriously? It was just supposed to be a joke entry in my poll!

[jack]

CartesianDaemon's seventh law of internet debates: that which you intended to take seriously will be derailed by irrelevant jokes and pedantry; that which you intended to be a throwaway joke will produce hundreds of pages of introspective commententary :)

[lethargic_man]

What are the first six?

[curious_reader]

Exactly. I don't understand why people started it to make it serious. Lethargic_man in a ballgown. Hehe!